In July of 2021, I wrote my very first Substack piece, and it was a response to a viral New York Times piece by the awesome duo of Jonathan Haidt and Jean Twenge. They’re NYT article was titled This Is Our Chance to Pull Teenagers Out of the Smartphone Trap, and as someone who grew up online, I discussed how I think the fears around social media often overshadow the good it has done for introverts like me.
I’m still extremely skeptical about the correlation between teen mental health issues and social media. If you want to know why, please read Deaths of Despair and the Future of Capitalism. With that said, I had to sit down and write this because I’ve noticed something that may be the result of social media that’s been driving me nuts. And it’s that it might be keeping people purposely ignorant and reducing curiosity.
For anyone who reads my work, you know I can write thousands of words. But I got things to do today, so let’s see if I can keep this under 1,000.
The joys of curiosity
I’m a naturally curious person, and I always have been. Ever since I was a kid, I had a million questions, and I was definitely the annoying kid who asked adults how everything worked and why people did things. Aside from being interested in human behavior from a young age, I was also a tech nerd. I loved taking things apart just to see how they were assembled and what’s going on inside. Personal computers got big before I hit my teens, and I built my first computer at a young age.
Although I was curious, I was never a fan of school, and it’s probably one of the main reasons I’m so vocal about how silly our education system is. A curious kid like myself slacked off because I just wasn’t interested in the majority of the topics we were forced to learn about.
I loved to read as a kid, but I stopped enjoying books when we were forced to read specific books in school. Then, I became an alcoholic and drug addict, and some might be surprised to hear that I didn’t read a single book for well over a decade.
When I was about two years sober, I got my first decent job in sobriety, and I was “in the closet” about my sobriety. It was one of those corny office jobs where people like to invite each other over for game night and have holiday parties (sorry if you’re into that. As an introvert, it’s my nightmare.) They’d also go out after work on Fridays to the bar. Each event had alcohol, so when I did show up, I had to make excuses not to drink.
I started getting a little resentful that I couldn’t just be “normal” and drink like everyone else. I got sober in AA, and there’s not much science in those rooms, but it saved my life. I started to question their horror stories of relapse after years of sobriety and was considering going out for drinks just to test the waters.
Well, a relapse could kill me, so I knew I was in a dangerous headspace. I realized I just had a question that I wanted answered: why can’t I drink but other people can?
I thought to myself, “I bet there’s a book about this.” So, after years of not touching a book, I took the bus to a bookstore and started browsing. I don’t know why, but the book Clean: Overcoming Addiction and Ending America's Greatest Tragedy by David Sheff (author of the bestseller turned movie Beautiful Boy) stood out.
I can confidently say that this book may have saved my life. From cover to cover, it was the science of addiction and all of the latest research up to that point. It explained the biological and psychological differences between addicts and normal people as well as environmental factors that lead to addiction. It discussed the efficacy of different treatments and outcome statistics for treatment methods. It had everything.
And as a side note, although that book helped me, as I’ve learned more, there’s a lot of questionable stuff in the book as research has developed even more. If you’re looking for a more up-to-date book, I recommend The Urge: Our History of Addiction by Dr. Carl Erik Fisher.
So, why do I tell you this story? Because that book was an “aha” moment for me. I had a question, so I figured someone put years of work into researching the answer and put it in a book, and I was right.
When I got canceled in 2019 (we’ll come back to this soon by the way), I had 1,000 new questions. I could not understand what was happening to me, so I grabbed a book. That book recommended other books, and I got those. Those books recommended more books, and I got those. And so on.
That year, I read 78 books. The next year, I read 283 books. And in 2021, I read 384 books.
Since 2019, my curiosity has gone into overdrive, and I can’t stop learning. Sobriety taught me to become intellectually humble and realize I don’t know everything. My philosophy is that there are so many smart people out there who have spent so much of their life researching topics, and they’ve been kind enough to put all of that knowledge into a book. How the hell can we not take advantage of that?
I can’t relate
(Sorry, but I don’t think I’m going to make that 1,000-word limit I set for myself. Hopefully, it’s worth it.)
And now, we’re back to social media. I remember that self-help guru grifter Prince EA used to make viral Facebook poetry vids, and one was on social media. It was one saying how terrible social media is, and in it, he something along the lines of “science shows social media has given people the attention span of a goldfish.”
First off, I cannot tell you how much I loathe people who make millions off social media by keeping people glued to their screens and then make even more money on content saying how bad social media is.
Prince EA was wrong and just tossed that line in there. People actually called him out because whatever study he was talking about didn’t exist. But these last few days, and probably even longer if I’m being honest, I’ve been thinking about it a lot more.
I see so many people ask questions and refuse to look into the answers, and I just can’t relate. When I have questions, I read entire books on it. When I have more questions, I read more books on that topic. Typically, when I get interested in a topic, I’ll read five books minimum just to see what the consensus is or if there are differing opinions.
This isn’t a brag but to make the point that if I can spend hours reading a single book to answer to one question, why can’t people read one article or watch a single YouTube video?
I actually try not to get all hoity toity about my reading habits and act better than because I get it. I understand people aren’t curious like me, and all of us are busy as hell. The fact that you’re even reading this is mind-blowing. You might have a million other things to do. In fact, that’s why I listen to audiobooks. I can listen while doing a ton of other things.
I get that people are busy and don’t have my same curiosity, but sweet Jesus, its bad.
Just off the top of my head, I can think of a few recent instances on Twitter, where I’m just shocked by the laziness.
When the queen died, I made a tweet about how we have the tendency to romanticize people after they pass away and neglect the terrible things they do. A guy asked me who else, and one example I gave was John McCain. He asked what McCain did, I sent him a short YouTube vid summarizing it, and the guy straight up said, “I’m not going to watch that.”
I tweeted about how increasing policing and incarcerating more people doesn’t work. Someone replied saying it “obviously” does, like it’s just common sense. I actually wrote about how intuition often fails us not long ago. Anyway, after some back and forth, I explained where there’s evidence this does not work, and they refused to look into it.
I said something about cancel culture, and the person said, “I still don’t know what you mean by cancel culture,” even though I’ve sent this specific person content on exactly what I mean. Clearly, they didn’t look into it.
Like, I just do not get it. I do not get it at all. It really seems like if you can’t change someone’s mind in a 240-character tweet, they’re completely uninterested. People are completely fine in their ignorance. Curiosity is like an itch that needs to be scratched, and they just don’t have it.
WTF is going on?
I’m going to try to wrap this up with some final thoughts and theories.
Did social media make people lazy?
As the title of this suggests, I’m still not completely sold. I do think we’re dealing with an availability bias when we say social media is making people lazy because people like us are constantly on it.
I regularly remind myself that there are billions of people who have no clue what’s happening on social media platforms.
Not long ago, my fellow book nerds and I had a good laugh at this tweet saying that the average American reads like three to five books a year. I’m not Mr. Popular, but I know a lot of people, and I can’t think of many who read even one book a year. When talking with other readers, they say the same. The only people who buy that bunk stat are those who only know other readers.
If that stat is true, we high-volume readers are doing a lot of heavy lifting to raise that average.
What I’m getting at is I don’t think social media made people lazy. Growing up, I didn’t know many adults who read the newspaper or books. I actually don’t even think “lazy” is the right word because a lot of hardworking people don’t read or look up information.
Are people actually curious?
This is the million-dollar question. I remember having a conversation with some reading buddies about this. We were discussing how we evolved to be curious, but I just wasn’t sold that people are naturally curious. Due to everything I’ve written thus far, I’ve noticed that it’s rare for people to have a thirst for knowledge.
Then, it hit me: people are curious but for specific things
I think the best way to explain this is to look at conspiracy theorists. We look at conspiracy theorists and don’t understand how they don’t just look up the facts or truth about topics. Nobody could argue these people aren’t curious. These fools spend hours and sometimes dedicate their lives to going down rabbit holes.
Curiosity is definitely part of the human experience, and we wouldn’t survive if it wasn’t. I guarantee that every person I whine about is insanely curious in different areas. I’ve seen this in the YouTube world before I got more into books. There are people who know every detail of a YouTuber’s life because they watch all of their videos or dozens of videos about that person. It’s the same with celebrity fandom.
So, it’s more about what you’re curious about rather than having curiosity at all.
Is it strategic ignorance?
Unfortunately, I think something else is at play here, and it’s our good friend strategic ignorance. While being curious about other topics makes sense because we only have so many hours in a day, it doesn’t explain some of the examples that led me to writing this in the first place.
Clearly, those people I mentioned who engaged with me on Twitter are curious about the topic I’m discussing, or they wouldn’t have replied.
I’m sure at some point, while you read those examples, you even thought or said to your screen, “Chris, those are polarized or debated topics. Of course, they’re going to have an opinion already and not want to find the answers.”
Exactly. Good ol’ strategic ignorance. Cognitive dissonance is a bitch, and I have to force myself to read books by people I disagree with. It’s hard, so I get it. One of the hardest things to do is change someone’s mind about something.
By the way, I can’t tell you how great it is not having to worry about any of these people reading this and having to deal with the awkward conversation of, “Hey! Was that about me?!” Just know, if I ever tell a personal story about someone (even though I always leave them anonymous), I’m 99% sure they’ll never consume the content because of everything we’ve discussed.
Why do you think it’s so hard for people to stay sober? The only reason I’m alive today is because I finally realized that I had to humble myself because maybe my ideas weren’t that great. I’ve seen a lot of people die because they couldn’t do that. And that’s one of the reasons I’m so passionate about this topic.
This is more than just politics for me. Seeking out disconfirming information legitimately saved my life. If you need a political example, look at the people who died from not getting vaccinated and realized they fucked up while on their deathbed saying, “I’ll take the vaccination now,” but it was too late.
So, I don’t think it’s intellectual laziness. It’s purposely avoiding disconfirming information.
Sure, people may not read, but they watch and listen. As I was writing about people I know who don’t read, I was thinking of a friend’s non-reading dad who watches Fox News 24/7. He’s the Tucker Carlson-loving old white guy we hear about.
Do you think I can sit him down and get him to watch or read something that goes against the Fox News narrative without losing his mind? Hell no.
If I’m being 1000% honest, I’m kind of done trying to engage in good faith with people. I know. It’s nihilistic as hell, but I’m just being honest. I spent multiple years trying, and I don’t think I’ve shifted a single opinion. People hold their beliefs so strongly.
When they’re asking questions, they’re not legitimately curious. They honestly assume you don’t have the answer. If you do have the answer or resources, they don’t want to look into it because they’d rather stay ignorant to opposing information.
I’ve had a real problem setting boundaries. A few months ago, I fucking snapped.
I had a stretch where multiple conservative followers were questioning so many things I tweeted when I shared what was said by someone they liked in a book or podcast interview. They’d say, “Did they really say that?”, and I’d spend so much time going back and finding exact quotes, and it never satisfied them. They’d also ask me for articles, data, or research, and I’d spend the time digging it up for them, and they woudn’t read it.
I’m a pretty chill guy and in a great mood 80-90% of the time, but I finally reached the point where this infuriated me, and I had to start rereading some anger management books.
At that point, I told myself these people aren’t engaging in good faith and actually looking for evidence or answers. They’re also not going to change their opinion regardless of the evidence I give them.
So, I set a boundary that I was just going to say, “look it up” and not do the work for them anymore. If they want the answers, they’re there. I’ve stuck to this fairly well, but nowhere near well enough. How do I know this? Because I’m writing this right now as a therapeutic tool because I was getting pissed again.
Although you may be thinking, “Chris, we have to have good faith conversations with others blah blah blah.” Nah, man. When I got sober, I learned my mental health has to be my top priority. Clearly, I’m not good at changing minds, and there are plenty of great folks at Better Angels as well as individuals doing this work. They’ll live if I’m not out there driving myself insane talking to people who refuse to change their minds.
Also, just a side note, Better Angels is like a rehab. People go to get help. I’m not dealing with people who want help changing their minds. It’s a much different scenario.
The illusion of knowledge
Lastly, I just wanted to touch on the illusion of knowledge. Our egos are out of control, and most of us think we know everything. I’ve written about this before, but “doing your research” doesn’t matter if you’re getting bad information. This is why this form of toxic curiosity is so brutal.
Every conspiracy theorist under the sun loves telling people to do their research. Why? Because they believe they’ve done their research by watching lunatics like Alex Jones and reading blogs from basement-dwelling loners.
Personally, I think intellectual humility is the ultimate value a person can have. So, if you have it, just know I appreciate you. Due to our egos, our default is to think we know everything, so it’s extremely difficult to admit you might be wrong. Again, I never would have done it if it wasn’t a life or death issue.
This problem of ego makes people have the illusion of knowledge. People sit comfortably in their bubbles listening to the same sources day in and day out and believe they know everything they need to know. Within their bubbles where ideas aren’t challenged, they’re given the confidence that they’re just always right because all they see are people agreeing with them. When they leave the “cave”, everyone else seems insane and wrong to them.
I recently re-read Suspicious Minds: Why We Believe Conspiracy Theories by Rob Brotherton. Aside from reminding me why people are the way they are, it has a detailed section on important research about this illusion of knowledge. Basically, when people have access to the internet, or when they get a tiny piece of information about something, their confidence in their understanding skyrockets.
This is like me handing you a knife, and you then thinking you could easily be a master chef because you have the tool that does the thing.
I’ve watched a few documentaries recently about the dawn of the internet. They all talk about how when the internet was created, the vision was how much information could be spread around the world. Today, we all have more access to information and knowledge than at any point in history, and each day, that increases.
So, it really bums me out that I even had to sit down and write this just to get it out of my head. Especially since I said I’d try to keep this under 1,000 words, and we’re currently at 3,089. Fuck.
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I have two partial answers for you. The first is that the most common model of human personalities includes a factor called "openness to experience" with six facets: active imagination (fantasy), aesthetic sensitivity, attentiveness to inner feelings, preference for variety (adventurousness), intellectual curiosity, and challenging authority (psychological liberalism). You seem to be very high on intellectual curiousity, and by implication most likely (but not necessarily) high on the others. It is likely that most people simply aren't as curious as you. See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Openness_to_experience.
The second is that each person interprets each new fact through the lens of everything else they've learned over their lives. An intelligent adult typically has a worldview shaped by decades of experiences, facts, and "facts" which are often very different than the ones you're using and that are shaped by that person's history, core concerns, and individual psychology. For more see https://www.conradbastable.com/essays/the-panopticon-prism-all-facts-serve-a-narrative.
As an example, it seems that struggles with alcohol were formative for you, but I drank heavily a few times in college and never had a problem with it. I average maybe three drinks a year now. We probably interpret facts about alcohol very differently. For you it's a threat and part of a redemption narrative; for me it's sometimes useful as a way to curb my introversion. Everyone has differences of perspective like that all of the time.