8 Comments
User's avatar
Hank Linderman's avatar

Thanks for your review. I'm a fan of Haidt's work, it's constantly evolving, he recently discussed the roles of affluence and lack of community as additional factors along with social media and smartphones. I think I'll skip this one.

Expand full comment
Antony Kalogerakis's avatar

I think this review misses Shrier's point that lazy, incompetent, infantilizing therapy-inspired teachers, social workers, and mental health 'experts' make bad parents worse. The 'what really annoys me' paragraph at the end is, thankfully, a fictional improbable scenario. If anything, the book might actually help those parents do parenting, not neglect their kids even more. I am not right-wing or conservative, and I do get that only conservative media give Shrier exposure, due to her last book, but this one is a really good read, which I would highly recommend you don't skip : )

Expand full comment
Chris Boutté's avatar

Let’s go with that. She’s asking unequipped parents to take control

How likely is that? Burdened, overworked, uneducated parents educating them and changing who they are or allowing the few schools with mental health services actually doing something?

Like, come on now. Her alternative is just leaving these kids untreated if we’re even being close to thinking realistically

In a perfect world, parents would not only be better parents but they’d also know more about and understand social media. That’s a big ask for parents who already aren’t doing enough

And as mentioned, the suicide and addiction rates for the parents of gen z are through the roof. Shrier is completely off with her hypothesis that millennials and gen x were parented “the right way”. I don’t see what we’re doing (or trying to do, rather) as making things any worse than they already are

Expand full comment
Hank Linderman's avatar

Haidt found additional factors besides smartphones and social media, they were affluence and a society that encourages individuality over community. And, I think the issue of wealth agrees with your point about the financial top 10% of the population vs working class. Richard Rohr also speculates that a conservative upbringing does a better job raising kids with fewer mental health problems, even if it's only because it provides something to rebel against.

As far as the "right way" to parent, Rohr also mentions a balance of unconditional and conditional / demanding love. Unconditional love alone leads to problems. (Rohr's book is "Falling Upwards".)

Anyway, I guess I better read "Bad Therapy" before shooting my trap off any further!

Expand full comment
Hank Linderman's avatar

It arrived this week.

Expand full comment
Nellye Hight's avatar

Curious about "The Body Keeps the Score"! I recently read it and really liked it! There were definitely some weird bits, but I felt like I finally had answers concerning certain things about me. Would love to hear you expound on this if you wouldn't mind sharing!

Expand full comment
Chris Boutté's avatar

Hi Nellye! Don't get me wrong, there's definitely some good bits in this book, but a lot of the science and "research" turns out to be done very poorly. While the book does somewhat give readers a better understanding of trauma, there's quite a bit that doesn't have scientific backing.

EMDR therapy, the one he promotes, has also been proven to be less effective than many other methods. They've found that oftentimes, those who have good results are experiencing a placebo effect, which is both good and bad. Good because they may have some relief from PTSD symptoms, but bad if the symptoms come back and they wasted time on this form of therapy, which can make them reluctant to try more effective methods.

I'm trying to think off the top of my head of books that discuss the bad science from The Body Keeps the Score but can only remember a couple that mention it. This one and Mistakes Were Made But Not By Me (this book discusses it in the chapter on recovered memory therapy, which was part of the satanic panic nonsense).

Here's an article: https://www.washingtonpost.com/books/2023/08/02/body-keeps-score-grieving-brain-bessel-van-der-kolk-neuroscience-self-help/

You can find some more articles with a little googling

Expand full comment
Nellye Hight's avatar

Thanks so much for all that info!

Expand full comment